"Only gangstas have hedgehogs for pets. BITCHES!"

JD old me today that he told his friend Denise about what he has planned for me in December and that she was envious of me. He said she said that her man would never do something like that for her...

THAT HAS ME SO PARANOID! ^_^

I asked him, "Ugh! So you're just going to leave me to be paranoid for the next 4 months?!"

He said, "Yeah, you know you like it!"

Yes I do, but still! ^_^ He's so wonderful. I'm just so effin' nervous and impatient! I wanna know NOW!

Today I decided that I'm going to start playing my flute again, so I dragged it out from the cabinet it's been laying in for months. I opened it and was immediately greeted by that wonderful "instrument smell". I don't really know how to explain it, I guess you can't really know unless you've played before and it's probably a unique smell to woodwinds.

Anyway, I almost cried because I felt so ashamed at how I'd let the poor thing deteriorate. I left it in the humid garage for literally months after I moved out of Frankie's mom's house, so the pads are just destroyed and the steel was all tarnished. I managed to clean it pretty well and get most of the nastiness off, but the polishing rag I have is over 5 years old, so it didn't really work that well. I need to get the pads replaced and I have no idea how much that's going to cost, but it'll happen eventually I suppose. The sound is still decent despite the horrific condition of the pads. I think it'll work okay for a while.

I then spent close to two hours searching for, downloading, and then printing sheet music off of the internet. I actually found a really great site for free sheet music and scores, so some of you guys might be interested - The Mutopia Project. I found a few pieces that I'm going to start working on tomorrrow.

I have felt bad since I stopped playing. I used to love the flute so much and then I just stopped playing. It was such a great release for me, even though I'm not the best player in the world, I still really enjoyed it. I think I was mostly just intimdated next to my ex-boyfriend Frankie who's like a music god... I'm going to try to get back into it and maybe get better. Who knows, maybe it'll even help with my depression. ^_^

I also weighed myself again this morning and it said I lost another half of a pound (that makes 2.5 already!), so yay! I really haven't been as hungry as I thought I would be. I'm starting to get sick of eating veggies as snacks (hehe), but I already just feel better. I was talking to my aunt today and she said that I should be able to drop the weight pretty quickly.

Also, if I just start being even a little bit more active I'll lose it a lot quicker. I don't need to do any really strenuous exercise routines, just move more. I'll admit, I really am not very active since I'm always home and it's too damn hot outside to do anything outside. I really enjoy doing pilates, but Rubi took back her yoga mat and I can't very well do them without one because it hurts my back, so I was kinda at a loss as to what to do for exercise since I'm asthmatic and have a lot of fatigue.

Then I realized! I watch CMT pretty much all day until 3 o'clock (that's when Dr. Phil comes on, and yes, I LOVE Dr. Phil! I've even had dirty dreams about him, HA!), so I'm just going to dance like crazy! I did it today on a whim and I got a damn good workout! Sweat dripping and everything! ^_^ I feel like a dorkass afterwards, but a more in shape dorkass. ^_^

I also figure that if I can jump on the trampoline or dance or jump rope or something for as little as like 5 minutes every hour (which shouldn't be hard at all!) that I will be getting a hell of a lot more exercise than I have for the last two years. This isn't going to be as hard as I thought I don't think.

I already feel better and I've been sleeping better too, so yay! I'm on my way! ^_^